For years, I lived in a cycle of restriction, guilt, and binge eating. When I first started working with a coach, I came from a place of extreme dieting—following a rigid meal plan, fighting cravings, and being told to “just stick to the plan” because, well, I was a bodybuilder. That mindset led me down a path of disordered eating and an incredibly unhealthy relationship with food, especially sweets.
I would binge on cookies, Oreos, chocolate—Reese’s were my weakness—to the point where I made myself sick. I wasn’t throwing up, but I felt physically awful, mentally drained, and overwhelmed with guilt. And instead of being honest about it, I hid it. I lied to my coach, told him I was staying on track when I wasn’t, and the cycle repeated itself over and over.
The Moment Everything Changed
When I started working with my current coach, I told him the truth. I wanted to be upfront about my struggles, my past, and my relationship with food. And his response?
“Just eat the damn cookie.”
That blew my mind. Up until that moment, I never thought it was okay to just eat sweets. To have a cookie and move on. But when I started allowing myself to have the foods I craved, something crazy happened—I stopped obsessing over them.
At first, I still overate. Years of restriction don’t just disappear overnight. But over time, I found balance. Now, I can have one or two cookies and be content because I’ve reworked my nutrition in a way that allows flexibility. I’m not constantly fighting cravings, and I’m not trapped in that binge-restrict cycle anymore.
Why Flexibility in Your Diet Matters
For me, and for so many others, restriction only leads to losing control later. This is especially true for women—PMS cravings are real, and the more you try to ignore them, the worse they get. Learning how to incorporate the foods you love in moderation prevents the extreme highs and lows of dieting.
One of the biggest mindset shifts I’ve had (and something I teach my clients) is this:
Instead of saying, “I can’t eat that,” shift to:
“I’m choosing not to eat that right now because it doesn’t support my goals.”
This small change makes a huge difference. It removes the all-or-nothing thinking and puts the control back in your hands.
Coaching Clients Through the Same Struggles
This is something I work on with my clients every day. One client, in particular, came to me struggling with nighttime binge eating. She wasn’t eating enough during the day, and by the time evening rolled around, her hunger was uncontrollable. She felt completely out of control around food.
Together, we worked on:
✔ Ensuring she ate enough throughout the day to keep hunger levels stable.
✔ Making meals enjoyable—if she got tired of a food, we changed it!
✔ Allowing sweets in moderation so she didn’t feel deprived.
Over time, her cravings naturally decreased, and she stopped hyper-fixating on food. She made healthier choices, not because she had to, but because she genuinely felt better doing so. Seeing her grow and thrive has been incredible because I know exactly what it’s like to be in that position.
Final Thoughts
If you take anything from this, let it be this: You don’t have to be perfect to be successful. You don’t have to eliminate foods you love. You don’t have to feel guilty for enjoying a cookie.
The key is balance, flexibility, and a sustainable approach to nutrition. It takes time to unlearn restrictive habits, but as long as you’re willing to do the work, things will improve.So next time you want a cookie? Just eat the damn cookie.